Grow, Baby, Grow… But Seriously, SLOW DOWN!

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At my daughter’s two-month check up and vaccinations appointment, the doctor found… TEETH. Yes, my child is teething at two months. They have broken through, and she isn’t three months old yet. What, sweet Jesus, is the meaning of this?!?

The same day I bore witness to her rolling over. Yep. Back to tummy… full-on rolling over.

I have to wonder how many moms out there experienced these milestones so early on in their infant’s life. What does this mean for the rest of them? Is she going to start walking at six months? Talking tomorrow? What do we have in store for us in the near future? What can I do to slow down time with my baby?

As parents we want to see our children thrive and grow, but can we please find a slo-mo button or something? I am convinced she is going to be asking to date soon and borrowing the car keys. I haven’t even started her college fund yet!!! Yikes!

Ila is my first and likely only child, so I am new to all of this stuff, but after two weeks of agony she had her teeth break the gum line and literally slept for three days straight. She woke to eat, sort of, then went right back to sleep.

I started to worry that something was majorly wrong because if she wasn’t awake and cranky for at least five hours daily and six nightly, there was obviously something wrong… right?! Nope… my sweet angel just finally got those jerks to come through and is a pleasant baby now.

When she is awake, she plays, laughs, and coos. There are no all night temper tantrums, high pitched screams for no perceivable reason, or hours on end of whimpering. Those days have disappeared… at least for a few days until the next set come in, or the room is too hot, or too cold, or her mobile stops moving, the carpet isn’t to her liking today, or the cat walked by again.

Ah… for now… we sleep. Glorious hours and hours of sleep.

We had been putting her in a swing to sleep in the living room which meant mommy and daddy slept on the futon in the living room with her. Now that she sleeps IN HER CRIB most nights, our bed is seeing our sleepy heads again. I have never missed a piece of furniture so much in my life. The days of me cursing my bed when I was 5+ months pregnant are gone, and I love that rectangular pile of coils and fluff more than I ever imagined possible.

How old were your children when they got their first tooth? Rolled over? Crawled? Walked? Spoke? I need to know what is normal and what is crazy comic book hero fast please.