Click here to read part one…
Night one: I threw the bedtime curfew out the window! Something I never thought I would do. I asked them if they were ready to go to bed, in unison they both replied “NOPE!” My response, “Okay, you guys can stay up and play, but I’m going to take a bath.” Their faces were priceless, a combination of “Is this the calm before the storm?” and “It’s party time!”
This mama was ready for a bath, in all honesty, I NEEDED a bath! They continued to play, and I went to run a bath. Shortly after, I heard giggles and realized I had been followed! This was not the deal! If they want to boycott bedtime, my cleanliness shouldn’t have to be surrendered. I explained to them that they might not be ready to go to sleep, but mommy was ready to wind down for the night. I heard giggles right up until I got out of my bath when I witnessed this:
No Bedtime curfew
Being that both of them passed out without being reminded to “use the potty” I’m sure my morning will be consumed with washing yellow tie-dyed sheets. But until then…HGTV will have my time.
During the two days following, I experienced only one tantrum by my three year-old, which was surprisingly easily diffused. Bedtime was also more relaxed, there were no complaints, but there were plenty of giggles and snuggles.
The most difficult part was stepping back and letting my kids learn how to “make sense” of their own feelings. I didn’t tell them when to eat or sleep, I just simply asked them if they were getting hungry or sleepy. Any time either one of them would seem to be struggling, I would ask them “Do we need to go rest? You seem tired.” Amazingly that would snap them out of anything they were going through at that moment.
Could it be possible that we as parents don’t always know what is best? Maybe, just maybe, our little ones could teach us a thing or two. Can you learn to roll with the punches, or in this case, the meltdowns?
Now in no way am I suggesting you throw your meticulous schedule out the window, you know, the one you have been specifically catering to each child since the day you brought them home? I am just simply sharing my new approach, my struggles and results. It is a possibility they will figure me out within the next couple of weeks and I may be back at “square one.” Until then, I will enjoy the laughter and lessened stress.
Celina, this is a great series and I am looking forward to part 3! As a new unschooling mom with a preschooler I have been working on the same sorts of shifts and finding the biggest changes I need are within my own habits.
Stacy, thank you so much for reading. Yes, most of the time our frustrations that result are just a reflection of our difficulties. We continue to grow. My philosophy is if I am still questioning myself then I’m doing alright because that means I’m willing and able to grow as a mom.
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