I never planned on leaving my home state of Michigan for good. When I moved a little over ten years ago, I was in my early 20’s and a newlywed. I was ready for adventure. Since leaving, I’ve lived in Hawaii, North Carolina, and for the past five years, we’ve made Charleston our home. I love it here, but wherever we’ve lived, I’ve always felt a little bit of a pull on my heart to move back. It’s hard to talk about, especially to new friends who are either transplants like me but are so excited to be away from their cold Midwest homes or locals who are enthusiastic Charlestonians through and through, so although I try to make the best of our lives here, underneath I’m dreadfully homesick.
Being homesick as an adult always feels a little strange, like it’s something you should have grown out of once you graduated college. Moving away, becoming independent, starting a family of your own, that’s what we’re supposed to do, right? When we’re teens getting ready to leave home for the first time, we imagine ourselves in a brand-new place with new experiences, living without a care in the world.
Now, as an adult with two kids and a full-time job, I miss and appreciate what my parents and extended family did for my sisters and me more than ever. I grew up surrounded by most of my family living less than a 30-minute drive away. My cousins were my first best friends, and we would spend the summers together at the lake with my grandparents watching us. During the holidays, we were always all together taking pictures around my grandma’s fully decorated house and stay until it was long past bedtime.
I want this for my kids.
I want them to be able to visit family on the weekends at a whim instead of having to plan and save for six months to drive 15 hours for only a few days before we have to leave again. I want to be able to call my sister and ask her if she can babysit for an hour for me while I run out for errands, or text my best friend to come out for lunch with me on a weekday.
I understand people’s drive to leave their home state and get out of their normal routine. it’s exciting and enlightening. I have friends tell me they didn’t really know who they were until they left their childhood homes, and I think that’s fantastic; but, after being away from home for over a decade, I’ve found out who I really am, too.
I’m the person who eventually goes back home at the end of their adventuring to settle somewhere they feel warm and comfortable after a long time away.
