Raise your hand if you don’t give your husband enough credit, praise, or acknowledgment for being Dad. My hand is raised! As mothers, we (me) often focus inward on our tiredness, our struggles, our to-do lists, our need for personal time, and space – even if it is hiding out in the bathroom or locked away in a closet indulging in chocolate, wine, or screen time. We mamas deal with a lot, don’t you agree?
Let me ask you this:
- Who manages the kids while we power through our to-do lists?
- Who is the person arm deep in cleaning up kid sickness because it’s gross, and we’re too squeamish?
- Who is the person capturing the palmetto bug or swatting mosquitos?
- Who is the person that runs after the kids when they take off in opposite directions?
- Who is the person that makes sure the pets are fed and taken care of before he leaves the house every morning?
- Who is the person that takes the kids out on nighttime adventures with flashlights, so that mama can watch the latest episode of Southern Charm? Wine in hand, of course.
- Who runs out to the store first thing Saturday morning because we just realized there’s no coffee? Nooooo!
- Who agrees to go out to eat with a full fridge in the house, because you had a craving (pregnant or not!)?
- Who helps you clean up the kitchen because you’ve hit the wall, even though he was up at 4:45 a.m. and spent all day on his feet?
- Who falls asleep in the kids’ room nightly, so you can make time for your mompreneur side-hustle?
These tasks may not exactly ring true in your house, but I am willing to bet that you can replace these with your own and even add a few more. He does all of these things. Just like we do all of the things. It’s easy to forget the contribution that the men in our lives bring to the picture because we are busy. We are overloaded. We are tired. And we are so over it. I wonder if we would have any shreds of sanity left if he wasn’t doing the things that he does?
Within the last year, my husband has not only done all of these things, but he has also supported me in my transition from corporate mom + entrepreneur mom, to entrepreneur mom + stay at home mom. He could see that my career working for someone else doing something that I was excellent at, but didn’t love, was draining my spirit big time. Without his support I would likely still be in that position or similar, feeling that I needed to chase a steady dollar because that’s what society made me feel like I should be doing. Instead, I was able to let go of what was holding me back. I’m able to spend more time with my kids. I’m able to focus on my creative outlet, building my local Charleston photography + creative services business. I’m able to make dinner without burning quinoa in-between overtime phone calls and emails. Who burns quinoa by the way? No one! You have to REALLY be not paying any attention to the stove whatsoever.
Take a few minutes today to reflect on the contributions that your other half brings to the daily grind. Be thankful mamas. Take a deep breath, and remember that you aren’t alone here. And he might have the same feelings of exhaustion and overwhelm that you do, in his own way.
Go ahead. Give out some extra hugs and praise this Father’s day.
I bet that’s all he wants, too.