Let’s set the scene.
You just had your baby. You had a relatively uncomplicated labor and delivery, and are now home with your new bundle of joy.
Your life has totally changed. Complete 360.
A short (yet oh so long) six weeks goes by, and you get the “okay” by your OBGYN to have intercourse again.
If you were anything like me, that moment is both a relief (yay, I’m healthy!) and a terrifying realization that you will have to have sex again.
Fast forward to two years later. Life is a whirlwind of toddlerhood.
Who in the world has time to think about sex?
I’ve been here. The mix of constantly trying to appease your toddler, working at your job, and combating the emotional rollercoaster of motherhood does not make for a hot, steamy night in the bedroom.
My husband and I needed some help. We needed to amp things up in the bedroom and make that time for each other. We needed that higher-level connection but didn’t know how to get there.
Here are a few of the things that helped us connect in the bedroom:
Reminder: What works for one person in the bedroom will not work for another. Do your homework and try things out!
- Read up! First off, read (or listen) to the book, Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life by Emily Nagoski, Ph.D.
This book changed the way that I look at sex. Emily Nagoski truly covers all you need to know about yourself. This isn’t a magazine article about “the best position” or “the right shade of rouge”, but a true dive into a woman’s mindset behind sex, and what stops us from wanting it.
2. Do some landscaping. If you are like me and are self-conscious of the way you look (and smell), I highly recommend Coochy Shave Creme – Frosted Cake.
I have sensitive skin and always get razor burn on my bikini line. But this shaving cream is so smooth and smells delish. It boosts my confidence because I know that I won’t get razor burn, and I will also smell like cake – enticing.
3. Talk about it! My husband and I are shy when it comes to talking about what we want face-to-face. After we downloaded the Coral App, we have been able to open up about what we like! This app has exercises, games, stories, and even playlists for the bedroom.
4. Lube. You need it. Let’s be real, we are all postpartum women here, so we need a little extra help. My favorite has been Foria CBD Lube. The CBD aspect of it allows for extra relaxation and comfort for your lady bits. They have a variety of other products you should check out as well!
5. Vibrator. I didn’t have a vibrator until two years ago. I’m actually so sad that I didn’t have one before because I am a part of the large majority of women that can only have a clitoral orgasm (not vaginal). The Evolved Pretty In Pink Bullet has changed the bedroom experience for me in such a positive way. It’s small, easy to turn on and off, and OH so powerful.
6. Keep it private! Last, but not least, is the Locking Pouch. This is a MUST HAVE if you have children, especially older ones who might be extra curious. No one wants to explain their sex toys to their kiddos. It also makes traveling or date nights at a hotel super convenient – just grab the bag and go!
Here’s to hoping you find what works for you and give yourself a little extra love. You deserve to feel good!