Whew! It has been a crazy two years since 2020. I personally think we can all agree on that fact. The world has endured a lot! We have seen it all, between the pandemic, toilet paper shortages, inflation, and we can’t forget about the murder hornets!? With all of that going on, emotions are rising amongst everyone. I’ve noticed a trend that I’m not a huge fan of:
We are back to parent shaming — even worse — mom shaming again, especially on social media.
What we started before 2020 — which was lifting each mama up, and not bashing any moms for what they do or believe in — has quickly started to dwindle away. This saddens me, A LOT. I understand that everyone has different opinions on different subjects and how they raise their families. However, that doesn’t mean that we can quickly treat or say negative things to them because they don’t think like you.
I wonder if anyone remembers that trending post(s) where a group of moms gathered together and took pictures of two moms, each with an opposing view. For example, one mama would be holding a poster that said, “I let my children stay up late,” and the other mom had a poster that stated, “I put my kids to bed early.” But at the end of that post, it showed how moms who have different thoughts and opinions can come together and choose not to judge others for how they raise their family.
Let’s face it: everyone is not going to think the same as you. That’s a reality that we have to face as a society. However, imagine how the world would be if we all thought the same. Boring, right?! What makes this world different and unique is the fact that we have our own thoughts on how we perceive the world around us.
I truly believe if we try hard enough, we can become what we had before 2020: a world filled with women who lift each other up instead of tearing down, simply because of our differences. Instead of quickly judging the way someone else thinks, maybe try to understand their reasoning and experiences behind those thoughts.
I remember growing up in a cult where if you were to have an opposing thought besides the ones you were taught . . . it could get you into trouble with the leaders of the church. Because of that experience, I am a huge advocate of “you do you”, or “let’s agree to disagree” on subjects that we find ourselves on opposite sides of the fence — but not letting that affect my relationship with my friends. Because I’ve seen firsthand how not accepting our differences can ruin relationships with others.
In fact, I think everyone (including myself) can benefit from stepping back and thinking about what comes out of our posts, texts, and mouths. We should ask ourselves: is it negative, does it hurt others, or would it tear apart your friendship with that fellow mama? We need to go back to the basics (the ones we learned in preschool) of the golden rule: “Treat others how you would want to be treated.” Learning to accept others for who they are would help us lead into a more loving world.
What are some ways to help us get back to building each other up?
Well, here are a couple of ideas to help out with that.
- Think before you say something. Maybe you see someone who does something different from your family. For instance, maybe you pack your child organic food, but someone else packs a Lunchable. Instead of saying something negative: “You really should pack . . . etc,” don’t say anything at all! If it makes someone feel bad — don’t say it!
- Compliment. I can’t tell you how much a compliment makes my day. In this negative world, we need more positive. So instead of looking at the negative, let’s find the positive and compliment each other. I truly believe this world needs a “Happy News Station.” So if you see something that your fellow mama is doing that you admire, tell her! It will not only make her day, but it will make you feel good for being positive and uplifting.
In conclusion, I understand how the world can put us all on edge. But for our children’s sake, let’s work together as a community to become more accepting of others. Let us lead the future generation with a good example by ending the shaming, bullying, and negative comments toward others who are different from you. We all need this reminder, even me. But if we strive every day to pour some sunshine into this world . . . it will get better.